The Unknown

When the world shrank so small into four walls.
When words are meaningless, blurted out just for the sake of saying something.
When promises has no meaning, a cheap consolation full of ingenuity.
When laughter got so hollow, thrown just to fill the quietness.
Sweet dream is even scarier than nightmare, blissfulness that becomes devastation when you're awake. When you realize that every happiness was, indeed, just a dream.
What is worth fighting for has either slowly but firmly taken from your grip, or pulled away from you so fast you can't even think.
The air got thinner and thinner and your breath becomes more shallow every second.
Darkness claims, covering your entire vision, leaving you alone in a place you couldn't even see.
With nothing to help you and no one to save you.
Your only friend is the prayer you constantly whisper to yourself.
Even that may slowly whither away....

Reality Beckoned

There were good days, I think
Leisurely days where we dance and sing
Days where smiling isn't a task
Times when laughter isn't a mask
Moments where happiness is real
When we can actually feel.

If those days exist, I have no recollection
Only thoughts of hesitation
Whether it was there
Or only a mirage in a land that's bare

Dare I not to dream even a second
A different thing reality beckoned
For I see nothing but darkness thick as tar
Something to wish upon from afar
Light I do not know
Happiness is just a distant glow

Never

Life is a constant battle she rarely wins.
Pound and broken, crashed and burned, she was never on the victory end.
She rise above only to let people knocked her out.
She rise above, help people rise higher, only to be knocked down again.
Floundering for help that she never gets.
Screaming for assistance she would never have.
She's running out of steam.
She's devastated.
Soon
She's going to be no more.

A Fairy's Lament

I am a fairy.
Living in an endless night sky.
With a pair of wings as my company.
I travel, not from places to places.
Instead, I wander between clouds.
Stopping is never an option.
For when I stop, all my power vanished,
taken away from me and not to return again.
Along the way I found people, faces.
Either I or them is the passerby, I do not know.
None stay, none come along.
I am a fairy.
Sent to set the stars twinkling,
and go around all over again.
Stopping is never an option.
For once I stop, I ceased of meaning.

A Letter to A Withering Flower

Dear flower,
I know this awful climate has hit you hard. You've stumbled and have been trying to get up but couldn't fully stand on your own yet. I've witnessed how you struggle to keep it together and barely made it.

But how I'm surprised when one day I saw how everything really affects you. It's as if you're losing your roots, ever so slowly, on life. Being thrown to so many rough winds and heavy rains, you feel as if you're alone in a hollow empty world.

I came and shook you. I have to. I couldn't let you drown in an obscure hole in the ground. I couldn't watch you sink without offering you a hand, something to grab on.

Dear flower,
It may seems as if I treat you harshly. But keep in mind that I do it for you and only for your own sake. You're withering, and I need to stop it from drying you up completely. I may offer you a hand, but my goal is for you to stand tall and proud on your own, blooming beautiful flowers all year round regardless of stormy winds and raging hurricane.

Dear flower,
Trouble will never ceased to came by and ruin things. But if you have your root firmly planted to the ground, nothing can shook you off your core. Like everything, this too shall pass. Nothing is destined to be forever. But if you ever feel tired of hanging on to your petals, just know that my hand will always be near. I will only be a holler away.

Alone we can stand tall. Together we can conquer everything.

Selfless Aside

I look around, seeing many in agony.
I lend a hand, I tried to think of a way out.

I look around, seeing many needed help.
I spare some time, tried to ease their burden.

When I look at me, I only ask myself to go for it.
To work extra hard, and relieve those with agony, and help those with burden.
After a time, my mind still on it, but my body gave up.
Then, and only then, I take a good look at myself in the mirror and realise
how I've let myself go.
How little I think of myself. How I've been neglecting my needs.

Now I made a promise, to see myself first before putting others on my view.
All the time of putting myself on the very last line of the list is over.
For now I realize that to take care of others, I need to take care of myself first.
Selfless isn't wrong, but you can't do anything if yourself isn't as strong as your will.

I Never Exist

I'm good at running. Running from my problems. Running from my life.
I'm good at hiding. Hiding from my family, my friends and, basically, the whole world.
I'm good at lying. I never even blink an eye whenever I tell lies.
I'm good at pretending. Pretending that everything's okay when it's absolutely not.
I'm good at denying. Denying my sadness, my anger, my feelings.

I'm good at this and that and a million different things, I'm basically an expert.
But when it comes to love, I'm helpless, I'm powerless and I'm the biggest fool.
Love leaves no space for me to slip in. Love pushed me away every second and made me the only outsider.
I'm incapable of loving and being loved. To love, I never exist.